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Parents, this one is for students, but you should watch it too. Here I discuss 20 tips for FAILING this semester. Of course, the intention is to be wildly successful, but this video is a fun exploration of real issues, and it WILL help. You can read all of the tips in detail from the transcript below.
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Video transcript:
Hey what’s going on, I’m Seth from SethPerler.com. I’m an executive function coach based in Colorado and I help struggling students navigate this thing called education so that they can have an awesome life. And in this video, I’m going to give you 20 quick tips for how to fail this semester. These are based on my own experiences because I failed quite a bit. This video is for students. Middle, high school, college students who want to fail this semester. Here is how I did it.
Number 1. Tell your parents you turned over a new leaf. You’ll say this to your parents when they ask, “What’s going on this semester, you going to be okay? If you need help let me know.” Blah blah blah. You’re going to be like, “Nope. I’m good. I got it. I’ve turned over a new leaf so leave me alone. I’ve got it figured out. I’m motivated. I’m organized. I’ve got it.“
Number 2. Don’t let your parents help you. And don’t let your teachers help you. Instead, say, “I’ve got this leave me alone. Get off my back. I don’t need help. I promise.” I swear don’t let them help you. So that’s number two. Don’t let them help you. Just say you’ll figure it out on your own.
Number 3. Don’t use a planner. Instead, try to keep everything in your head. Try to use little sticky notes or make little notes everywhere. Try to somehow maintain it from your memory. You’re going to remember, try to believe that story. That is number three.
Number 4. Don’t be proactive. Instead, I want you to wait until the last minute before you do something. Or you can just pretend it doesn’t even exist. Pretend that the homework, or the assignment, or the test, or whatever, is not even there at all.
Number 5. Don’t check your online portal. Don’t keep tabs on your grades. Ignore them. Don’t ask your teachers what your grades are very often. Just kind of forget about it put in the background. That’s a really good way to help yourself fail this semester.
Number 6. Don’t advocate for yourself. It’s very hard to ask for help, so don’t do it. Don’t go to your teachers, don’t go to their office hours. Don’t see your teachers before class, after class, before school, after school, or during lunch help. Don’t advocate for yourself and say that you might need some help, guidance, reminders, or anything like that.
Number 7. Don’t take responsibility for yourself. Instead, use plenty of excuses. Blame it on everything. You only try every once in a while. When you’re not taking responsibility for yourself, you should try to use the self-pity model. Say, “Oh poor me.” This is what I did, it works really well.
Number 8. Don’t think about your future. Don’t connect the dots that the actions or things you don’t do now will impact your future. Just pretend that your future is going to build itself. Or you might win the lottery.
Number 9. Don’t do quality homework. Instead, just do the bare minimum.
Number 10. Don’t organize yourself. Just start off with whatever system you had before. Cram everything in the backpack. Or you can make it look organized so that people get off your back, but don’t actually organize your stuff.
Number 11. Don’t study. Instead, do things like using Quizlet. It seems like you’re studying but really does basically nothing for you. Don’t study, don’t actually focus on studying or taking time to study. You’ll probably just remember enough of it without studying.
Number 12. Don’t take care of yourself. In other words, don’t get restful sleep. Don’t eat food that nourishes your body. Don’t get plenty of exercise. Don’t brush your teeth. Don’t shower regularly. Don’t do the things that you need to do to take care of yourself. That’s a real good way to make your executive function foggier.
Number 13. Don’t declutter your life. Instead, bring more clutter into your inbox, into your mind, into your home, into your bedroom. Don’t take the time to get rid of clutter you don’t need.
Number 14. Don’t be honest with yourself. Instead, lie to yourself. Tell yourself stories that aren’t true. Distract yourself from the truth.
Number 15. Don’t deal with your inbox. Instead, allow your inbox to be there to collect email. Don’t respond to people when they email it to you. If you do respond to people when they emailed you, it, when they email you make sure that your response is very short and unprofessional and almost borderline rude. Really basic, simple, don’t capitalize. None of that stuff.
Number 16. Don’t resist distractions. Instead of focusing on what you need to focus on, be focused on what your distractions are and procrastinate on the things that are important.
Number 17. Don’t take your time to produce quality work instead of taking your time and really diving deep into your work. I’m being patient and really seeing where the magic is instead. What I want you to do is rush through it to get it done as quickly as possible.
Number 18. Don’t have a good place to focus and study that is free of distractions. Instead, study in bed. That’s the worst possible place to study. So you want to definitely take advantage of doing your homework in bed, on the couch, on the floor, wherever, and have a bunch of tabs open and have your cell phone. Don’t have a sacred place to focus.
Number 19. Don’t change your mind. Stay stuck in your mindset. Keep the same mindset that everything will fix itself, that you can ignore everything. Be lazy and fail. I stay in that mindset because it helps me procrastinate and stay stuck.
Number 20. Don’t invest in developing your strength, your interests, your passions in the things that matter that gets in the way. Get way off course and spend your time instead of investing in things that have no impact on your future. Things that are time-wasters things that just, you know, like watching TV, YouTube, gaming, or just social stuff only.
So these are the things that I did. I failed out of college. I dropped out of a second college before bailing out. I was not a successful student and I used those things. This is true. And if you follow this advice, you will fail the semester you will be retaking classes. You will limit the choices that you haven’t in your future and you will struggle as an adult to be successful, how to be happy, to be healthy, and the truth is that I did change my life. I did turn it around and it was the hardest thing I ever did. And if you were someone who struggles with this stuff, it’s going to be the hardest thing you ever do. It’s okay. It will help you grow. We need you to develop the best version of yourself, your strength, and your passions. The world needs youth. And I’m not just saying if you have something amazing and special and perfect that we need you to have skills and talents and gifts that we need in this world. We need you. It’s hard if you struggle with executive function like I do. It’s very legitimate your brain works differently. You have amazing strengths with certain things that you do. It’s very easy for you. For example for me, it’s creativity. It’s very easy for me to do creative things, to come up with new ideas. There many strengths that I have, but there are certain things that are hard for me, like trying to focus and use executive function. But you’ve got this. You can do this. If I can do this, anybody can do this.
The challenges that you’re going through, at least the way that I look at it, challenges that I went through as a young person, the challenges that I go through today are gifts. They are gifts. They helped me to become a better person, to become stronger, to learn what I’m good at. To learn what I’m not good at, and to find ways to have other people do those things while I can focus on what I’m good at so that I can bring good to the world. Do your best and then do a little bit better. There’s a quote by a guy named Jim Rohn Germans. “You have the possibility of becoming. You cannot believe what it does to the human spirit to maximize your human potential and stretch yourself for the limit.” And when he says you can’t believe what does the spirit, it brings your life to maximizer human potential. We need you.
The final note that I have for you on the video today is to never ever give up. Never ever give up. Yes, it’s hard. Yes, it takes time. Yes, it can feel like you’re climbing a mountain, but don’t give up because you will get there. You’ll be able to accomplish your hopes and dreams and you will be able to contribute. You’ll be able to have a great future never give up. So once I did those 20 things and I switched it, and I did the opposite of those 20 things and I started to take my future seriously, and I understood that I had gifts to give to the world that I wasn’t a worthless human being, I really had something and I understood. Even though it’s hard, I can change my life. When I started looking at these challenges as a gift and when I decided to never ever give up and to do my best. Do a little bit better and things started really changing my life. It started completely taking a massive turn around and I have a good life today. So I wish that for you, so have a fantastic day have a fantastic New Year have a fantastic semester. Never ever give up. I will see you soon.
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